Kobe Bryant must fall, the 'at the beach version'

So, basketball fans across America are speaking about the NBA Finals and Kobe Bryant possibly winning his fifth ring and taking revenge on the Boston Celtics from the Lakers embassasment, in their 2008 performence. Well, personally, I would prefer to see the Lakers lose this series terribly and Kobe Bryant retire; it's bad enough this son of a bitch has four rings already. I am, however, struggling with a few political dispositions with this very well set up NBA finals.



Here are a few of my concerns (some are yet to be acknowledged):

1. Kobe Bryant is a rapist that settled a case outside of court. No matter what legal agreement was reached, Kobe is still a rapist.

2. I'm sure, that even if some people don't want to admit this, I believe the Lakers has several NBA referee's on their payroll. (most of them playing in game one). I say this because, Kobe Bryant aggressively assaulted Rasheed Wallace with a stiff elbow and Kobe wasn't thrown out of the game. After seeing this, Kobe should have been arrested and arraigned for Manslaughter.

3. Kobe Bryant is a terrible role model for the youth of America.

4. Kobe Bryant is indirectly responsible for the financial deficit in the State of California.

5. Chris Rock wasn't refunded for his ticket to the NBA Finals due to the disrespect that was generated by Kobe Bryant. Chris Rock is a paying customer and should not have been insulted in this manner.



To conclude, Kobe Bryant is classless and gives basketball players a bad name. If the industry wants to expand it's horizon, we need to see Kobe be removed from basketball. Kobe Bryant in my eyes is the BP oil spill of basketball; he's destroying the basketball enviroment and this need to be handles swiftly and thoroughly. Hopefully, game one was the celtics being nice, because, I would personally hate to see Kobe wear another ring on his finger, of course unless his fingers are broken.

Lawrence Taylor then danced his ass into some shit.

Well, after reading the recent 'eye buldging' current events involving celebrity promiscuity; I only have one question.... What the FUCK is in the state of Virginia's water supply? Plaxico Burress, Chris Brown, Michael Vick now Lawrence Taylor. Soon, every celebrity from the state of Virginia is going to have an asterisk by their name with any record they may hold.

I'm a little lost why a 51 year old would go after a 16 year old. I don't know if Lawrence had a case of dyslexia when checking her age or if he got lost at a Justin Beiber concert. One way or another, if it can be proven that there was sexual intercourse, Lawrence will have to use an abundance of his defensive positions to survive at least 5 years of prison.



However, I'm really struggling with a few things in regards to the 'offense' (The Hooker, The Uncle & This Fuckin' Pimp):

The Hooker:

- What causes a 16 year old to be in a hotel room @ 4:00am in the morning on a school night. I'm pretty sure she wasn't going after her 'school night' badge on foursquare.

- Why suddenly does she get raped by what happens to be football legend, LT. He's not slipping under the radar here, but, I'm sure he wasn't her first client.

- Where the fuck is her parents!?!?!

The Uncle:

- What could have been done preemptively to prevent this disater overall. Disciplinary actions towards a minor is not illegal.

- What guardianship role does he play in this case?

The Pimp:

- When is the last time he's payed taxes to the IRS?

- Why won't he tell us who really beat her up?

Overall, I think all parties involved are guilty. LT, for not inquiring about the age of the hooker. With him being so great on the football field, where is his peripherel vision. If he can spot NFL Player going for a catch in a damn helmet, why couldn't he see this one coming? The Hooker not being a fucking teenager and the pimp for obvious reasons. This could either be an aquittal for LT because he has a good lawyer or he's going to jail and this 16 year old Jezebel is going to used as a martyr because of her own ignorance. I'm sure she'd do great job bullshitting America on Oprah. This incident was a disaster from the begining. I give all parties involved a rating of 16 out of 51.



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Kick-Ass... I ain't scared of you muther-fuckers.

So, I recently took a visit to the local theater to observe the new film "Kick-Ass". Phenominal film, nonstop action, great plot and that fuckin "Hit Girl".... wow! I walked into the movie theater not completely knowing what to expect, this is what made this film even more enticing. I'm glad those muther fuckers at Disney didn't acquire this marvel project. Personally all they seem to do is fuck great stories up and turn them into nursery rhymes. If you think Obama is a socialist, maybe you should visit disney.com.... muther fuckers.

A handful of complaints have surfaced regarding the audience this film is marketing towards. First and foremost, I'm sure every person that has seen at least one movie in their lives understands the rating system. When a movies has a rating of 'R', that means it's not for children.

Here's a few mental notes for reference:

- if a movie is rated 'R', that means it for seventeen (17) and older.

- when you see a thirteen year old girl carrying a gun and a double-edged sword, maybe you should inquire about the plot.

- don't use McLovin as a fuckin excuse for your kids to see this movie. I don't give a damn if he looks 16, he's over 20 and a rated 'R' actor. Superbad and Role Models was rated 'R' as well.

For all who show interest in seeming this, don't walk in with with a sense of critique, walk in with a sense of humor. I lost about 2kg laughing my ass off.

I give this movie a 4.99 out of 5.00



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

I survived the KFC Double Down and lived to tell about it.

So, I finally took the purge and travel to the local KFC to taste the infamous Double Down. I have to admit, personally, I wouldn't finish the sandwich for moral reasons. This doesn't take away from the quality of one of the best fast food sandwiches to hit the market; regardless if it has more salt than the island of Malta.




To comment in regards to the media, I believe the American Heart Association, PETA and all of those other damn organizations with tax-ID numbers needs to stop scaring Americans in regards to what they consume. I've read more articles in the past speaking out against the Double Down than about cigarettes, drugs or Burger King. The hypocricy in the media needs to give this sandwich a chance, as we know, the Double Down isn't going to last for long. However, we're still going to deal with other sandwiches like The Triple Whopper, The McDonald's Angus & let's not forget about Hardee's that place has enough grease to give John Travolta a fountain of youth makeover.

Overall, I would try this sandwich again if I was totally wasted and on days that I've clearly watched my sodium count. The other sandwiches listed above are stay out of my eating rountine completely. I personally would recommend trying the sandwich if you don't fall to the will of healthy eating propoganda, in that case you're probably too afraid to ever indulge yourself outside of fat free yougurt (which is very good by the way).

I give this sandwich a 13.80 out of 15.

Crystal Head Vodka... from your skull to mines.

So, I finally decided to veture away from the typical trends of alcoholic beverages. I have to admit, I've never consumed a beverage in my drinking career of that has ever provided such a clean finish. This is probably the best seventy dollars I've ever invested on my liver. Well, probably not. However, this is something that you can consume and use the pictures from your telephone to recall your antics of the evening. I give Crystal Head vodka a 4.78 out of 5.0.



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone